Thoughts about Christmas Eve

I’m so happy it is finally Christmas Eve.  On Christmas Eve, all the presents still sitting under the tree are like a nuclear core of anticipation and excitement.  Joy seems to radiate.  The tree stays lit all day just because it is pretty and I don’t care how much extra electricity we are using.  The house is decked out in its holiday best and we have plans to make happy things happen.  I love Christmas Eve probably even more than the big day that follows.  It’s the one last hurrah before Christmas morning leaves a FEMA-worthy wake of ripped paper and empty boxes and everyone seems to crash all over the house like marathon runners.  Not to mention that for 12 more hours, the threat of being put on “the naughty list” still works.  I love Christmas Eve because somehow all the greatest qualities of the season are packaged into one day- the love, the joy, the peace, the kindness, the goodness, the selflessness, the giving, the magic, the anticipation, the traditions, family, friends and everything else.  And yet it is always bitter-sweet.  I know it signals the beginning of the end (and that always makes me feel a little blue) but it also holds so much potential.  As any parent knows, Christmas is so much better when you have kids and can see it through their eyes.  I am fully aware of the tick of the clock and all that means and I know Christmas may not be as magical next year.  My children’s eyes may not be filled with as much wonder and awe.  Children grow and change and that means the way we see Christmas changes too.  And though that is not always or even necessarily bad, it still means the life is always moving and evolving.  So as much as I love to celebrate Christmas Day and all that it means… it always reminds me that I have to wait 364 more days for it to come again and so much can change in that time.  The making and baking of cookies this year means all my children still believe in Santa- and I ache just a little because I can’t guarantee that will be the case 364 days from now.  And so I love Christmas Eve because more than gift wrap is still intact--- hopes, dreams, moments, childhood.  People are coming and not going.  Homes are filled with families who are actually paying attention to each other instead of people consumed in their own little worlds filled with all their new things.  So, while it is still Christmas Eve, I will look at my kids’ faces a little longer and I will make a greater effort to remember what they were like this Christmas Eve and what their eyes silently say.  And on top of that, I will look up more and kneel down more because though there are some things that will be ever changing, there is One that never changes and it is truly because of Him that we have a reason to celebrate this season (and always).